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Anul trecut de Halloween am strigat la nevasta-mea:
-Iubito, e o vrajitoare la usa, deschid?
-Da , zise ea, da-i niste dulciuri si da-o-n mortii ma-sii!!!
De atunci, soacra-mea nu mai vorbeste cu mine !!!
Ion , gata de insuratoare merge cu miresa la doctor.
- Acesta o controleaza si-i elibereaza un certificat madical. pe certificat scria: P.U.U.P.
Ion intreba in dreapta, intreaba in stanga, pana da de o asistenta si o roaga sa-i explice ce diagnostic are:
Nimic grav, prezinta urme usoare de penis !
Doi ardeleni citeau ziarul:
- Bai Ioane, ia uite ce scrie in ziar: “o bomba costa 3 milioane de dolari!”
-Tulai, de n-ar cadea si in curtea noastra una!
In razboiul dintre Iran si Irak, un iranian si un irakian stau fata in fata in transee si se impusca de zor. La un moment dat iranianului i se blocheaza pusca:
- … ma-tii de pusca imputita! injura iranianu’ in cea mai pura limba romaneasca de care era el in stare. Irakianu’ il aude si il intreaba
intr-o romaneasca stalcita:
- Bei, da de inde stii tu romineste, bei?
- Pai am facut scoala in Romania.
- Zeu? Si unde fecut tu scoala?
- In Timisoara.
- Nu mai spune! Si ce scoala fecut tu, bei?
- Politehnica. Da’ tu de unde stii romaneste?
- Pei si eu fecut scoala la Romania.
- Daaa? Ce scoala?
- Eu fecut Medicin la Tirgu Mures.
Iranianu’ intre timp isi reparase pusca si incepe sa traga dupa irakian rafala dupa rafala, incarcator dupa incarcator:
- Ia de-aici, mama ta de ungur!
Dacă trece Oana Roman prin faţa televizorului, ratezi trei emisiuni !
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